Decisions! Such a strong word! In every turn of our lives we have to make some decisions regarding various matters, situations and circumstances. However big or small, decisions are decisions! And when we talk about decisions! We usually have some guidance on various matters, however personal things they may be. But when it comes to something as big as thinking about a child then what to think, what to do?
According to Dr. Gayle Peterson’s: A new definition of family is born when a baby arrives! Husbands become fathers, wives become mothers, mothers become grandmothers and fathers become grandfathers. A myriad of changes cascades through several generations, on what sociologists define as the family cycle.
Here are a few things, that might help you in deciding whether you with your significant other, should have a baby or not!
1) Strength in the relationship – When two people come together to take care of a baby, they have to do it mutually. Love, care and understanding between one another is important and it becomes further more important because if there’s not a healthy bond between parents then there is a high probability that it can affect the baby both tangibly and intangibly. Usually during first few years with the baby, parents are fine; however, later, the weak relationship between parents surfaced up and lands up on divorce or any kind of domestic violence. Now that can affect the psychology of the child. BIG TIME!
2) Space in the house – With a child, comes a lot of responsibilities and a whole lot of other stuff like furniture, cradle, toys, clothes and the list goes on. If you have a very small apartment it might be a little tricky and difficult to make space for the new member! Well, if you’re ready to do that, then good for you.
3) Are you ready to love another human being more than yourself? When you expect a baby, it is something that you can’t reverse for your entire life. Yes, there are methods like MTP, but if you really want one, then there’s absolutely no going back! The journey starts from 9 months on the inside and then the rest of the child’s life outside! Love, care, understanding, nourishment are a few things that has to be taken care of! With so much negativity in the outside world, creating a strong foundation for a naïve soul is a challenge and that can only be done if you are willing to give your time and love to the child.
4) Your finance base – Although in this entry, all points are more or less equally important, we have to focus on things practically! Raising a child is a BIG step in life. And if you are really keen on having one, then you have to think about the child more than you think about yourself! And that includes the baby’s needs like: food, clothes, toys, etc. And when the baby grows up, you will enroll the baby in pre-school then school and further education. Apart from that, baby’s personal demands, etc. Can you afford all that? Does your salary pay enough to look after another human being who will be under your care until the baby grows to look after him/herself?
5) Your age & maturity – This is something a couple should think about before planning for a baby! When I say age, I mean the right time! Do you think you are mature and responsible enough to handle your work, personal relations, marriage, own self alongwith taking care of a baby – who cant express itself for around first two years – and its needs? Of course you are not alone and your spouse (no offence!!!) or relatives may be there to support you all the while, but still think about it.
6) Medical Problems – It really is nice to have someone so small in your house that helps eliminate all the negativity of the society and drown the noise of this world that’s running so fast, that our minds can’t cope with. However, when we talk about this situation, the factors within are equally important when compared to the factors outside. Is the mother fit and healthy enough to let another human being grow in her body? For nine months a soul is going to grow and evolve in your womb! Do you realize that it is a BIG thing? And as for the general health, most couples don’t realize they have to go under a check up and meet a gynaecologist and get the necessary tests done. STD’s are something we neglect but during baby planning better get it checked.
7) Taking up a New assignment – If you’re thinking to take up a job or work or exams anytime soon while deciding on pregnancy then think about it again! Take note that along with a baby, pregnancy welcomes other things too, like: a change of diet, pills, exercise routine, meditation, lots of rest, huge research on body and medical knowledge, enormous amount of trips to the doctor, etc! So in this case, it’s very essential not to think of getting any other important assignment in the near future! However, being pregnant, you may would like to consider offloading some of your current job responsibilities, indeed, if possible.
8) Irregular sleep pattern – Babies are adorable. They bring out the child in us and give a new meaning to innocence. But like yin and yang, day and night, fun has frustration too. Babies have different schedules and body clocks. In the earlier days you’ll see that babies tend to sleep more in the day that at the night. And they cry! A LOT! They need lots of things. Like baby food, milk, water, etc! You may need to get up several times at night.
All said and done, it’s up to you and your partner now! There’ll be joy and there’ll be changing of diapers too! These are a few major points to look upon before deciding for a baby!